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Requests
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People need each other, and it is normal for people to ask favours of each other or borrow something from others. Each one is free to agree or refuse.
Hesitancy Regarding Requests
People are hesitant to make requests because of fear:
- Of invading others’ privacy
- That the other person will not be able to refuse
- That they will owe the other person something
Types of Requests
There is a great difference between a request, a command and a hint:
| Type | Definition |
| A Request | A request is to ask in a clear and comfortable manner for what you want without impinging on the rights of others. It may also comprise asking someone to change behaviour. |
| A Command | A command is stated in such a way that the other person is not given the chance to refuse. |
| A Hint | A hint is to make an indirect statement about your needs and then to expect others to understand exactly what you require. Example: To say: “I feel like going to the movies tonight.” Note: This is not a request. It only becomes a request when you conclude with a clear invitation such as, “I should appreciate it if you would come along.” |
Recap
Remember: It costs nothing to ask or to refuse.
You have:
- The right to make requests to other people.
- The obligation to accept their answers.
- The ability to repeat or rephrase a request when someone’s answer is vague or unclear.