Global searching is not enabled.
Skip to main content
Page

Emotional Control

Completion requirements
View

One of the critical abilities that a good leader should have is to be aware of his/her emotions and what he/she is feeling.

You allow yourself to become angry or frightened. Different people will respond differently to the same event. Therefore, it is important to understand that you do have power over your thoughts and emotions. You can apply emotional control.
There is nothing wrong with any emotions; they are there to trigger a response for your own safety and survival. They serve as an outlet for inner-reactions to life’s challenges. As a leader, however, it is critical that you deal with your emotions responsibly.

This does not mean that you will no longer feel any uncomfortable emotions. It means that you will be able to:

  • Recognise uncomfortable emotions quickly.
  • Understand what underlying thoughts evoked the emotions.
  • Deal with the emotion in a responsible manner.

Applying Emotional Control

Step 1

Get in touch with your feelings

 

Whenever you experience an uncomfortable/negative emotion, describe it as accurately as you can.  Identify the emotion as specifically as you can.

Step 2

Describe the activating event

Note what it was that appeared to have triggered the events that led to your feelings.

Be factual, not emotional, in identifying the trigger.

Step 3

Recognise the irrational thoughts

 

Identify the values that were affected by the event.

Identify the underlying beliefs.

Analyse why this made you feel emotional.

Identify what irrational thinking is occurring.

Step 4

Consider and choose

 

               

Rephrase irrational thoughts/negative beliefs to positive thoughts and beliefs.  This process happens in the conscious mind and will be a continuous exercise until you have mastered the skill.

Ask yourself the following questions:

  • Is this thought true/factual, based on objective reality?
  • Does this thought lead to protecting my life?
  • Does this thought get me what I want quickly?
  • Does this thought keep me out of trouble?
  • Does this thought keep me feeling the way I want to feel?
  • Is this thought conducive to my emotional well-being?

Step 5

Respond responsibly

Respond to the event in an appropriate manner.

Respond in a manner that will portray your leadership.

Act assertively.

Be true.